


夜空の下で青い薔薇（Blue Roses Under the Night Sky）

by xLightningToki



Series: Post-SAO Chronicles (a.k.a. Eugeo’s post-canon adventures) [4]
Category: Sword Art Online (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Family, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Platonic Life Partners, Post-Canon, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2020-01-24 09:55:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18569029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xLightningToki/pseuds/xLightningToki
Summary: Then he asked the most important question of this moment: “What happened?”No response.Still discomfited, huh?Eugeo couldn’t blame him. It was not every day in which one lost composure in front of another.He continued to rub Kirito’s eyelids tenderly. “…If it helps, you can always talk to me.”Kirito faltered. Was it truly appropriate to reveal all of his anxieties, even if their main source wassitting right beside him?※※※Kirito has a nightmare for the first time in a while. Eugeo doesn’t know that he’s the source of the problem.





	夜空の下で青い薔薇（Blue Roses Under the Night Sky）

**Author's Note:**

> _This_ is what happens after you listen to『Forget-Me-Not』and『虹の彼方に』by ReoNa. I swear, the anime is trying to torture us and make us all fall into depression. But I’m not going to give up on Eugeo—not now, and not ever.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I don’t own _Sword Art Online_ or any of its elements whatsoever, just this story.  
> ※Please do not reprint without my permission.※

あの夜空の下で、青い薔薇が咲いた。

手を繋いで、僕らは只前だけを見詰めた。

ずっとお前の側に居たい。

ずっと君の側に居るよ。

だから此の瞬間を忘れるな。

_…一緒に幸せを探そう。_

* * *

Nightmares were a rarity to Kirigaya Kazuto, but whenever they occurred, they always reminded him of countless regrets.

　　Some people believed that dreams were the windows to one’s soul. To Kirito, they constantly exposed him to memories that he wished that he could forget. From the time when he was first trapped in the death game _Sword Art Online_ , he had witnessed slaughter and suffering, and experienced crushing mental fatigue and sorrow.

　　But what haunted him most was seeing the people that he failed to protect. Diavel, Sachi, Keita… The list went on and on, piercing holes into Kirito’s young heart. The feeling of not being able to do anything… The sheer helplessness as he watched them being taken away… It stung both his eyes and soul.

　　Losing Eugeo was the final straw. Kirito considered the young blond as his first and only male best friend, so when Eugeo had sacrificed his body to protect Underworld, Kirito’s mind had completely shattered, leaving his friends to pick up the pieces.

　　His life had always been like that following the release of SAO. Log in. Play. Fight to the death. Log out. Rinse. Repeat. And each time the cycle started afresh, more upsetting hallucinations haunted his brain.

　　Ever since Eugeo had been resuscitated in the real world, the amount of evening terrors had lessened drastically, as if to assure Kirito that not all hope was gone. He was reminded of his friends and family; therefore, he had resolved to do better and protect them with all that he had.

　　So he was quite surprised when he experienced a bad dream one night.

　　It started off as pleasantly as one might expect—he and Eugeo, in their refined coats from Underworld, sat in a vast field of blue roses, stargazing under a brilliant violet sky adorned with galaxies. With no one else in the premise, the two boys were engrossed in their own little world.

　　Then Eugeo stood up, dusted soil off his coat and said, “Well, it’s time for me to leave now.”

　　“Leave?” Kirito repeated, his eyebrows wrinkling. “This instant? Where to?”

　　“Away,” Eugeo answered vaguely, explicitly declining to meet Kirito’s eyes. All right, then; now this was starting to get on Kirito’s nerves.

　　But hold on—things weren’t adding up right. Why wouldn’t Eugeo dare to look at him?

　　Suddenly, an immense surge of consternation began to churn in his stomach. “Eugeo, you’re not making any sense.” He hopped to his feet and frowned. “What aren’t you trying to tell me?”

　　“I…” The blond shook his head, his light tresses dancing in front of his face. “I’m going somewhere far away, so far that you can’t follow me.”

　　“Far…” And that was when Kirito noticed the cracks.

　　The lower half of Eugeo’s now glowing body had begun to slowly dissipate, rupturing into tiny white chips that floated toward the sky. The petals of the surrounding roses were breaking off of their stems and encompassing Eugeo like a cyclone.

　　An unwelcomingly bloody image popped into Kirito’s mind, and he found it hard to breathe. The pounding of his heart beat roughly in his ears.

_THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP…_

　　“S-stop,” he managed to rasp, extending his fingers. He didn’t know whether the command was directed to Eugeo or himself. “What is going on? Please…stop…”

　　Eugeo’s eyes closed and crinkled. “It’s time for me to leave, Kirito. I’m sorry. I really wanted to spend more time with you, just for a little bit…”

　　“No…” the black-haired boy choked, shaking as Eugeo’s body continued to fade away. “No… This cannot be happening… You don’t need to leave so soon…”

　　“I’m really sorry… This is what I get for hurting you, huh…?”

　　“That’s not true! You didn’t do anything wrong, so just come back, Eugeo! I’m begging you!”

　　“Please…don’t forget me…”

　　“No…!” His legs trembling and his throat burning, Kirito tried to break into a run. “No, don’t go! Don’t… Don’t leave me alone in this world without you! _EUGEO!_ ”

　　And he outstretched his arm to grab his friend’s—only to grasp the air in his bedroom.

　　Kirito blinked as he stared at the pale ceiling, covered by his duvet. The curtains of his windows had been left open, so the white moonlight seeped through the glass and shimmered on his bed and the floor like billions of tiny crystals.

_A dream…?_

　　He lowered his arm and sat up, hugging the blanket to his chest. The house was completely silent, so he could hear crickets singing outside. Since Eugeo was sleeping in the adjacent room, Kirito hoped that his scream didn’t wake up his best friend.

　　He didn’t want to bother Eugeo about this silly reverie, even though his eyes were watering unconsciously.

_But why won’t these tears stop?_

　　He buried his dazed head in the blanket, his sniffles soaking it as he murmured Eugeo’s name over and over again like a mantra.

* * *

Kirigaya Suguha had woken up in the middle of the night to down a glass of water. Normally, she would have gone back to bed as soon as that was taken care of, but since it was the weekend, she decided to act leisurely for once.

　　Yet as she made her way to her room in her fuzzy slippers, she was jolted out of her half-asleep trance by a scream from her brother’s chamber.

　　Squeaking in fright, she hurriedly clasped a hand over her ear. What in the world was going on here? The house wasn’t being robbed, right? No, it couldn’t be; the main door was locked and the alarm was set. And more importantly, did something happen to her big brother?

　　Panting, she sprinted toward Kirito’s room and gently turned the doorknob so that only a small fraction of the room was visible. She sighed when she found no signs of a scuffle.

　　Kirito was sitting in bed, a comforter wrapped around his thin frame. With his soft features and bony pale structure, Suguha would have nearly thought him as sickly, but luckily, he was breathing naturally.

　　Squinting her eyes, she could trace moist trails on his cheeks. Goodness, was he _crying_?

　　She was about to step inside when she heard a familiar name pass through his quivering lips: “ _Eugeo…_ ”

　　Oh. It was _that_  kind of dream again, wasn’t it?

　　Suguha bit her lip and carefully shut the door so that her brother wouldn’t perceive her. Normally, she would have just walked inside and comforted him on her own so that she wouldn’t disturb her parents’ slumber, but now that Eugeo was here…

　　Mm, he had a right to know. Perhaps it was time that she told him about the situation.

　　She tiptoed to Eugeo’s room and slowly opened the door before treading inside. The flaxen-haired boy was dozing away in bed, swathed in his mantle as if it were a cocoon. Suguha exhaled deeply when she realized that she was going to have to rouse him.

　　She mumbled a silent apology before taking the liberty to shake Eugeo’s shoulder. “Eugeo-san! Wake up!”

　　Unlike Kirito, Eugeo was a light sleeper, so he groaned but fluttered his eyes open after sensing the unsolicited jiggle on his shoulder. Blinking, his green orbs distinguished straight, neatly cut black hair and dark irises.

　　“Suguha-chan?” he murmured, rubbing his eyes while temporarily forgetting that his robotic body was incapable of producing tears. Why was the girl up in the middle of the night? “What’s wrong?”

　　Suguha was secretly relieved that Eugeo didn’t react as violently as she had expected. “It’s Big Brother. He’s had a bad dream and he’s crying in bed and he keeps on calling your name. You’ve got to help me!”

_…Huh?_

　　Crying? Calling his name? That didn’t sound like the cool and levelheaded Kirito’s typical behavior. “Ah…” The fair-haired boy threw off his duvet and stumbled into his slippers as Suguha galloped outside. “All right; I’m coming!”

_What ever could be the matter?_

　　They skidded together at the front of Kirito’s door before barging in, only to find Kirito’s head still huddled in his blanket. The dark-haired youth must have not detected them, for he didn’t raise his head or greet them.

　　Eugeo clicked his tongue. _That guy is going to suffocate himself if he doesn’t get up,_  the boy thought absentmindedly as he advanced toward his best friend. He contorted as his ears picked up Kirito’s sniffles.

　　Just what had happened while he was asleep?

　　Sitting on the edge of the bed and placing a gentle hand on the other boy’s shoulder, Eugeo whispered, “Hey, Kirito. Can you hear me?”

　　A pause. “…Eugeo?” Good, he got a reaction.

　　“Yeah, it’s me. Can you please lift your head?”

　　“Hm…” Kirito reluctantly obeyed, rubbing his red-rimmed eyes with his sleeve. Eugeo could still see water welling in those black orbs, and his chest started to ache. Darn it.

　　Kirito must have understood how awful he appeared, for he grimaced and muttered, “Oh…”

　　How embarrassing. It had been a while since he blubbered like that in front of Eugeo. He felt as though his dignity were oozing out of him. What would his buddy think of him now?

　　“It’s okay,” the blond said quickly, as if he had read Kirito’s mind. He hesitantly placed a hand on Kirito’s cheek and wiped away the developing tears. His core throbbed in sympathy as Kirito leaned toward the touch. Briefly, Eugeo wondered how many times Asuna and Suguha had dealt with this predicament.

　　Then he asked the most important question of this moment: “What happened?”

　　No response. _Still discomfited, huh?_  Eugeo couldn’t blame him. It was not every day in which one lost composure in front of another.

　　He continued to rub Kirito’s eyelids tenderly. “…If it helps, you can always talk to me.”

　　Kirito faltered. Was it truly appropriate to reveal all of his anxieties, even if their main source was _sitting right beside him_?

　　He sluggishly opened his eyes, only for them to meet the equally shadowy ones of his loving sister, who nodded at him resolutely.

　　Then he turned to gaze at Eugeo—patient, compassionate, gentle and _alive_  Eugeo.

　　He might as well get everything off of his chest; he was fed up with perjuring himself, anyway. “…Okay.”

　　And then words just started pouring out of his mouth. He talked about his recent dream of Eugeo disappearing. Later, he yakked about his ceaseless guilt of being manipulated by Rath, the consecutive nights without sleep, and the emotional burdens that he pushed into Asuna and Suguha’s hands. He complained about the pressure of so many people relying on him to fight for integrity. And he cried and cried and _cried_  about leading Eugeo to his sorry excuse of a future, about watching his sword-turned body shatter under Quinella’s rage, and about simply letting Eugeo break the Taboo Index and involving him in such a terrible war.

　　Ah… In the end, everything was Kirito’s fault, was it…?

　　He could hear Suguha weep quietly at the doorway, her hands muffling her sobs. His stomach roiled upon learning that he accidentally made his little sister shed tears.

　　At present, his throat stung, but that didn’t matter to him now, for he didn’t know what else to say. And Eugeo had been silent the whole time…

_Is he mad at me…?_

　　Then Eugeo gradually draped one arm behind Kirito’s neck and another around his torso, pulling the ebony-haired boy closer to him. Kirito lost his voice as he listened to his chest beat against Eugeo’s.

_THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP…_

　　And Eugeo’s voice resonated in his ears like silver bells.

　　“You didn’t do anything wrong, Kirito. I know that you had worked hard to protect Underworld.”

　　“I’m sorry…”

　　“I have no regrets, though. If I had never met you again, I would have never known that Alice was still alive.”

　　“But because of that, you… You…!” Kirito tailed off, preventing himself from elaborating. He didn’t want to say that dreaded word, even though his best friend had defied all odds and was currently trying to console him.

　　Eugeo must have understood what Kirito had implied, since he said doggedly, “No, that was all my decision.”

　　Silence.

　　“Listen, Kirito. I have never once blamed you for what was to come. Because of you, I finally found a reason to live, even though you wouldn’t want that of me. You taught me the beauties and faults of Underworld, and you strived so hard to defend it against the very people from your own world. You treated us—these man-made artificial intelligences—like human beings.”

　　Kirito stilled. Eugeo took a shuddering breath before he resumed.

　　“I know… I know that I should be mad at Rath for treating us like guinea pigs. But I can’t, and it’s so _frustrating_  because none of us would exist without it. But _you_ , Kirito… You helped us rebel. You showed us that it was okay to question absolute authority and pave our own future. To be honest, I would rather suffer while knowing the truth than forever live in a lie.”

　　The flaxen-haired youth’s throat rumbled, and Kirito realized that his friend was actually _crying_ —not with his eyes, but with his heart.

　　“Kirito… You’ve been bearing this burden all alone, haven’t you? I’m sorry… I wish I could have done something to help…”

　　“No, Eugeo. You have nothing to be blamed for. I know that you wanted to protect Underworld as much as I did. And I was never alone. There are so many people that I have to thank for supporting me. But I’m sorry…for not telling you everything sooner.”

　　“Then…let’s stop hiding things from each other from this day forward. I think that we’ve all suffered enough as of late. No more secrets, okay?”

　　Kirito didn’t even hesitate in his answer.

　　“Right. No more secrets.” _It’s a promise._

　　He curled his fingers into Eugeo’s fair locks, pulling the other boy’s head to his shoulder. Meanwhile, Suguha (having not uttered a word since Eugeo first approached the dark-haired adolescent) cautiously walked over to settle herself on Kirito’s mattress. Huffing in barely concealed amusement, Kirito tugged his sister to his slim chest. Suguha first froze before relaxing in the affectionate embrace and nuzzling into Kirito’s shirt.

　　The three stayed in that position for a few minutes, caressed by the dim rays of the moon. The Kirigaya siblings’ eyes had finally dried, leaving behind indistinct stains on their pallid cheeks.

　　Then Kirito broke the tranquility by releasing a fat yawn. “Gosh, I’m exhausted… I’m going back to sleep.” After an awkward pause, he continued, “You guys can leave now, I guess.”

　　Eugeo and Suguha lifted their heads and glanced at each other as if they were attempting to perform telepathy. Kirito didn’t catch the twin smirks curling on their mouths.

　　He  _did_  notice both of them collapsing on top of him, dragging him under his blanket. He hissed as his head met the pillow.

　　“What…? Hey, what’s going on?! You guys aren’t planning on just staying here, aren’t you?!”

　　“What’s wrong with that?” Eugeo sang, a mischievous grin on his face. Kirito wondered how the other boy came to be so deceitful. Actually, never mind—he was still as precocious as he was in their childhood. That was probably Kirito’s doing.

　　“That’s right!” Suguha chimed in wholeheartedly. “It won’t be so bad! Look!” She patted the bed ardently, treating it like a bongo drum. “This bed can actually fit three people!”

　　What was this, a slumber party?!

　　Kirito sputtered, struggling to find any evidence that the bed wasn’t large enough to fit all of them. He couldn’t. “B-but…you guys don’t even have pillows!”

　　Encouraged by his protest, the two troublemakers snickered, and chaos sprung.

　　“That’s okay! We’ll get some from your closet! Right, Eugeo-san?”

　　“Right! I’ll get them this instant! Keep Kirito down, Suguha-chan!”

　　“Hah?! Okay, this is going too far; Big Bro is going to get upset—”

　　“Here they are!”

　　“Like I said—argh!”

　　“…Ah, one of the pillows fell on his face.”

　　“Big Brother looks so funny! Ha, ha, ha, ha!”

　　“ _You guys!_ ”

　　“Shh! We can’t have Mr. and Mrs. Kirigaya hear us!”

　　After several minutes of tossing, wrestling, shushing and giggling, the three teenagers at last dropped onto the bed together in a tangle of limbs, with Suguha lying near the wall on her left, Eugeo on the far right and Kirito squished in between. The latter could feel the others’ body heat encase him as he spread his blanket over the trio.

　　His arms underneath the bedspread, he reached over to grab their hands, and smiled when they squeezed his hands back.

_That’s right… We’re together. Ah, I feel so safe now that they’re here…_

　　He snuggled between them, two of the many people that he held so dear, and they all shut their eyes. He pensively noted that Suguha smelled like fresh spring greeneries, and that Eugeo smelled like blooming roses.

　　As Kirito fell into a new set of dreams, the stars in the night sky twinkled merrily by means of heralding a new day.

* * *

なあ、気付いたか？これらの青い薔薇は、

綺麗な星空の下で熱心に咲いている。

ねえ、感じるかい？心に愛が芽生えているのを。

夜空の下で達成不可能な物に達している。


End file.
